Be careful of expectations. Some expectations are healthy, some are not.
Expectation: A state or act of looking forward or in anticipation.
There is an emotional attachment to our expectations that is not released until the expectation is either met or not met. If the expectation is met, positive emotion follows. However, if the expectation is not met, negative emotion follows. Emotions will generally trigger corresponding words and behaviors.
Here’s the deal: When there is a disconnect between expectations and reality, disappointment and often times helplessness sets in. Repeated disconnects between expectations and reality create cynical attitudes and false judgements against others and ourselves.
How to examine your expectations
Expectations you place on others – Are they fair, reasonable, realistic, and spoken? Who’s responsibility is it? How can expectations placed on others be met if they are not clearly communicated? You’re correct…they can’t. Make sure the expectations placed on others are within their ability to meet. You are setting yourself up for disappointment if you place expectations on others that are not clearly spoken AND within the other person’s ability to meet.
Expectations you place on yourself – Are they fair, reasonable, realistic, and spoken? Are they your responsibility? Many times if we verbalize the expectations we place on ourselves we will realize that they are unfair, unreasonable and unrealistic. Particularly the expectations that result in self-condemning thoughts.
Expectations others place on you – Are they fair, reasonable, realistic, and within your ability? Are they your responsibility? Sometimes you are unaware of the expectations that others have placed on you. Understand they exist, but know what is yours to own and what is theirs to own. Don’t try to meet an expectation that is unfair, unreasonable, unrealistic, or not within your ability to meet. You are setting yourself up for disappointment.
Keep REACHING FORWARD for God’s best in your life! Make sure it’s God’s best and not out-of-whack expectations from yourself or others!
Comments welcome and encouraged!